Short Stories

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November 29 2014 - December 22 2014

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He who makes me happy

December 22 2014, 3:20 PM - Hamish watched television with me and it was a show where they trained a little kitten with a clicker. They used the clicker to make a sound and then gave the cat a treat, and repeated many times, to get the cat to associate the clicker sound with something positive, a treat. Hamish was very pleased with what he was seeing, and he said "Yes" about that. Namely, the clicker sound was just like Hamish's own palate click that he makes when he is pleased with something. So to Hamish, in Hamish's way of thinking, there was the sound of "palate click" and a cat getting "snacks", and Hamish was very pleased because he agrees that "snacks" and "palate click" can go together.

I mean, this just tells a world about Hamish's psychology and function. You see, if Hamish wasn't as ruled by his instincts as he is, he could have thought further to know that it wasn't the palate click, but a clicker, i.e. that it wasn't somebody making that noise, and that it wasn't necessarily meant as a palate click. Yet, being Hamish, his mind seems to always first go ahead and use whatever understanding he already has, and so the sound of palate click is already associated with the palate click that his species makes when they are pleased at something. It even brought about emotions or sensations in him, just as if he would have heard a fellow Dragon Turtle make a palate click about snacks. He is amazing, isn't he?

He has talked more about Santas. Usually when I wake up in the mornings, it is as if he would have lingered around my bed just waiting for me to wake up so that he can speak his mind to me and vent his frustrations. He doesn't like Santas using "his" color red, so he can be very upset at Santas. I try to assure him by telling him "Yes-No Santas" and by showing him my mental images of stepping with my bare foot on a Santa figurine.

Hamish is very afraid of broken glass. Some of the hybrid children tell Hamish that they have eaten broken glass, so that Hamish wouldn't dare try to eat them out of fear that he would ingest the broken glass. Hamish watches everything I do very carefully, and he saw me pick up a broken drinking glass to take out with the recycling. He was so worried that I might put pieces of broken glass into his pink snuggy rugs (the one that is in the bedroom). I reminded him that I would never hurt him in any way. This morning he showed me a sheet of his shedded scales, he said it was from his ankle.

The Dragon Turtles that live in a mountain in a secret location are given sheep to eat. I wondered why Hamish doesn't also eat sheep. It seems that Hamish may have had to volunteer to work for the Agenda, in exchange that the others in his race are left alone to live in peace. The Dragon Turtles that live in that secret location are a bit different than Hamish is. They seem a bit more peaceful and at ease.

This morning Hamish showed me mental images of a ladybug with its red back and black spots. He asked me why it has those black spots, I said I didn't know. He then showed me the images of toadstool mushrooms, with its red cap and white spots. Hamish wonders why these are similar to his own red back of the head where he has rows of orange buttons. And then I wondered, that of course, on both the ladybug and the toadstool mushroom these spots against the red background must serve as warning signals, and so Hamish's back of the head with its orange buttons must also be. I just know I feel very perplexed and hypnotized, mesmerized, when Hamish - on a rare occasion - makes me look at his buttons on the back of his head.

Hamish has a tiny face, just the eyes, nostrils and mouth on the end of a long tubular neck. We humans have a large head and large face, and we are meant to show our faces to each other and to look at each other's faces. Whereas Hamish's race is meant to hide away their face, as if their face is something vulnerable. Their body is equipped with so much visual cues. You are meant to look at his back hump, his bright fire engine red color, even the orange goosebump zits that are like colorful warts on a toad, and the orange blunt buttons, but you are not meant to get to ever see his face, his face becomes hidden amidst all the other powerful signals that occupy the onlooker's attention and floods our senses with perplexity, warning, perhaps even awe at the sight of his magnificent back hump that normally sports a row of black thorns.

What is interesting, is that Hamish usually never looks at my face. When he looks at me, I would say 90% of the time his eyes glance over at my womb area where the eggs are, well, because I am his assignment of guarding the eggs. At other times he will look at the back of my head where we have that area of depression. As a human I am so used to being looked in the eye, or thought of as a person, and so when he refers to me as "his eggs are speaking" and won't look me in the eye, I often feel completely overlooked and I say "Hey Hamish, I am a person!"

My shield, was there. That is what you were saying. About it, my. It was important to mine, that I wasn't looking at it too much. My mother also had those! The shields. I was very important and prominent because of it. - Hamish, the very first sentence was in my native language, the rest in English

It never feels as if we are two people who have gotten to know each other and bonded like two human friends would. There is always this sense that he thinks of me practically, almost technically, in terms of "the things I do" or "the things I say" or "where I am sitting right now at the moment". I haven't fully become a person to him, as I would be to a human. He "knows me", and we are good friends and somehow I think we get really well along with each other. But this is an alien being. He is not a human. But, I must say, as the human I am so overly occupied with my own human way of thinking of him as a person, that I don't really notice the ways in which he looks at me any less than a human would. I feel that our friendship is phenomenal. I adore this creature!

Yet, when we are close, when we are really close, I fear him, I scream and I run away. It has happened a few times that we have had a close encounter. When we are close, I mean in the same dimension, I then sense him glancing at me and thinking about the "liver snacks" that are contained inside me, he then feels dangerous, like the predator that he is, and I never want to wrap my arms around him, I scream like if it were a murderer before me, I run away. So this friendship we have, is something I can artificially experience, while we are not too close, while I can live in the interpretation of him in human terms. But when it is really him and really me, then it is not nice. Then we are predator and prey. But, while he hides most of himself in that other dimension, I am a human, I am loving and friendly, and to me he is my best cuddly friend in the world, and you all know what that looks like, how I coo over him, and how ever happy he makes me.

And ooh, last night a Zeta was talking to me and I got to meet an adult Zeta-human hybrid. It was neat. The Zeta was surprised that I wasn't hostile (because of my many tantrums about the hybrid children, because of the elements of pedophilia which I strongly - understatement - opposed to). But this was just me and a real Zeta alien talking, so how could I be upset? It was cool! Neat! I told him/it we must "do this again", and that next time I will want to also meet my Hamish and Alpha Remulan.

We like our buckets filled with food. Did I say that to you before, last time? That we like to eat? We are not monsters here. We are liked. You like us? We thought that was a neat game that you played. - Alpha Remulan (AR)
What game? - me
I love you Alpha Remulan. You guys are fantastic. I wish I had a bucket of food for you. - me
Yes, they are never quite filled plenty enough. But, we like to eat them. We like our food here. - AR, says this brown stick insect that I love and adore

That Zeta encounter was while I was technically asleep, meaning a real encounter however it is that they do it. So, not just us talking from here and there.

But as for Hamish's face. His race does communicate a lot with their facial expressions. For one, we have the "lemon face" where he squints his eyes into a thin narrow open line and closes his nostrils completely. He does the "lemon face" sometimes when I ask him a question. I still have no idea why he does the lemon face about questions. We can be talking and I ask him any question big or small and he instantly responds with the lemon face, then we continue talking about other things and he takes the face away, then another question and he does the lemon face. It must mean that he won't answer questions, but it sure is one fun way of showing that! It is at times when he doesn't answer the question or vocalize any response toward the question.

Hey, this is me. What is the lemon face? - General Patton, first I was shown the US Navy ship
Why do you need to know? Hamish is my Dragon, I am writing about his facial expressions. - me

Then we know how he talks with his mouth, i.e. if he feels uneasy or insecure (I think he feels that way at these times) he will open his mouth and face a person. It makes me feel uneasy, oh and he also does it when he is upset and wants me to stop talking. It makes me feel as if he would have yelled at me to "shut up", even though he makes no sound with it. So the open mouth seems to mean that he says that he is not going to discuss the current matter and that he is not to be bothered with it.

The eyelids of course talk a lot. Upper eyelids that close diagonally down (with the lower edge on the outer side of the eyes) means that he is smiling. It is a Dragon's smile, he smiles with his eyes. Lower eyelids don't close upward diagonally, but horisontally, and mean that he is amused and laughing, it is his laughter and yes they have a sense of humor! Hamish's sense of humor is different of course than a human sense of humor, but you have seen examples here on when he does that. Perhaps, if a person thinks something that Hamish knows the person cannot dominate over him, then he thinks that is funny, that is the only example of his humor I can think of, but there is more to his sense of humor than just that.

If a Reptilian closes both eyelids fully to close its eyes, then it means pacifism. Black Reptilian does this often, as if to show me that he won't fight me, that he stays calm. Hamish doesn't really do this. It makes them look like a nesting pigeon closing its eyes, it's really cute.

Hamish does not communicate in any ways with his tail! I have known Reptilians, especially Hamish, intimately for three years. Not once have they "meant something" with their tail. However, when Reptilians want me to see a mental image of them where they are standing in my room, they will almost always just show me a picture of their lower part at the lower part of the legs but especially so that I see their tail, and probably they would be happy if all I could see was just the tail. This is the only way in which they have used their tail with me. But another thing, Reptilians feel delight if their tail is yanked. It is almost an erotic guilty pleasure, and sometimes a Reptilian will ask someone else to pull on their tail, not kidding. If you ever meet a Reptilian, remember that he will most likely not be opposed to being caressed or gently pulled on his tail at the root of the tail. I once had a real close encounter with a dark green Reptilian and found myself stroking my hand down his tail repeatedly and he was enjoying it. He felt like dry hard scales, it was awesome!

We like to eat your children. Do you think that is awesome too, you dimwit? Yes, she said yes, to that. - Black Reptilian (BR)
Well aren't you a hoot. - me
Did you find that, hilarious?!?? - BR
No. But humans eat animals too, it is the same thing. And that's why I'm a vegetarian. Are you a Draconian? Are you from Alpha Draconis? - me
My eggs. - Hamish in my native language
My Hamish. My Hamish. - me, 2nd in my native language

I want to learn more about what Reptilian body odors signify to them. If you think about it this way. The Reptilian sense of smell is incredibly acute. They will pick up the slightest scents, even nuances that my human nose is not aware of. And then contrast that to the fact that their own body odors are incredibly pungent and strong. So they must be flooded with a very loud experience from their own body odors. The sense of their smell from Reptilian body odors must be "yelling" some information in their mind, a signal that they can't miss! But I wonder what it says?

Hamish loves to stomp with his feet and pee on my used sheets that I put down on the floor, and he says that these used sheets smell like me. He stomps his feet and puts his own fragrance on his snuggy rugs, yet when I bought him that new plush red rug for our anniversary he rejected it because "it didn't smell right" (and true, it has an industrial rubbery smell that doesn't wash out in the laundry, but also that it didn't have his scent already on it, whereas his previous rugs already do so why should he adopt a new rug?). And when I wash his ruggety rugs in the washing machine, he is sad because "they don't smell right" anymore because it washes his own scent away. One of the things I love the most are when Hamish says that, "his eggs smell right" about his own Dragon Turtle eggs in a nest, he thinks that they "smell right". Isn't that wonderful?

Do Reptilians smell dominant toward each other? What do they communicate to one another with their body odors? I can ask this black fellow:

Dear Black Reptile. Do you have a strong body odor? - me
You dimwit!!! - BR, as if I would have injured him and caused him pain
What's the matter? - me
We boil your children in pots. - Dark Lord
Oh. Do you now. What does it taste like? Don't forget the seasoning. - me
She doesn't care about it. - Crocodile Man to others there
You are not, nervous about me? - BR calm and soothed
No. Humans eat meat too I said. You won't eat me. - me
Black Reptile's eyes go delirious, because of the thought of eating me, because I mentioned it.

Reptilian eyes become delirious when they are immensely pleased and their senses overrun by thoughts of dominance or of eating. You saw many examples of that in the first book "The Orion Project: Real? Or Imaginary?" with the Reptilian named Snake, how his eyes would close. Hey, let's talk to Snake!

Snake? I miss you sometimes. - me
They weren't my eggs. I don't miss you at all. I wasn't there for you. - Snake, first sentence in my native language
They were my eggs. - Hamish, my native language

Too Much Cute

December 18 2014, 10:58 PM - I know, I was going to shut down The Orion Project (to stop writing on this website) ever since after the horrific incidents.... But, then there's this Dragon Turtle and he's too dang cute. Here's what he's done the latest:

The other day when I woke up in the morning Hamish was talking about some Santa figurine he had seen. He was upset at the Santa for wearing a bright red pointy hat. I promised Dragon that I would step on the Santa's hat with my bare foot. (That is how Hamish dominates and takes care of nuisances, he steps on them with his flat red duck foot.)

Today. I was browsing some pictures of farms where they have cows and horses. Hamish sneaks up close to me and feels very worried that his ruggety snugs might end up in the animal pasture and get soiled with animal droppings, Hamish tells me that his rug is his rug and should not be taken there. I reassure Dragon Turtle that it is Hamish's rug and I lay the rug flat down on the bedroom floor for him to step on. He loves that rug like a little child loves a comfort blanket.

The Aliens get worried when I'm browsing on the internet. They also happen to be very snoopy little critters that want to know what I'm doing. "Kermits are here", says Hamish and refers the problem to the Dinosaurs. Dinosaur tells me that Hamish is requesting to be the Master or Ruler (however you translate it from my other language). I tell Dinosaur that yes, Hamish demands the same of me. But hey, in case you didn't notice, the gist - or cute - of this story is that Hamish said "Kermits" about the Dinosaurs, whom he otherwise also calls as Frogs. Who wouldn't want some Kermits visiting at their house? Oh my goodness, these alien critters are so cute I just melt and want to snuggle them.

Hamish also told me to take birthcontrol pills the other day, somehow he thinks - or more that he worries - I might find some man and get pregnant. And he told me the reason for the contraceptive was so that I wouldn't "get pregnant with a baby in my vagina", yes, he said vagina about it not the womb so that sounded just very weird. There has also been a lot of pointing and reference to his back hump, and I too have remembered to honor his back hump of course. My Turtle Turtles!

Fat White Lizard

December 12 2014, 7:49 PM - I watched a tv series and a guy and a girl finally got together in the movie and it was sweet and romantic. Hamish, who is guarding my eggs, gets carried away again, somehow he thinks that because I watch a movie about a couple that gets together (it wasn't even a sexy scene, they just kissed and in the next scene it's already afterwards) then it must mean a threat that I am going to have sex with the man in the video or at least with some man. So he shows me a mental image of Prince Charles, like the other-dimensional Illuminati version. Hamish says that if I want to have sex then I have to have sex with that guy.

I got upset with Hamish. I told him, "Yes-No!". I wasn't quite sure what to have as the "Yes" (read below, about how Hamish uses Yes-No with a contrast between something that is Yes and something that is No). Eventually I chose Hamish as the Yes and the guy as No, well, basically that meant that I would rather have sex (or something) with Hamish than with Prince Charles, but so be it, at least I was saying No to that guy and using Yes-No to boot. Then I told Hamish that (wait, what's this?)

[INSERT made same day: What I didn't get to write here is that "Then I told Hamish that" I would rather be a lesbian than be with Prince Charles, and you should've seen how Hamish started thinking, it was a bit confusing to him, but he managed to figure out that two female reproductive systems couldn't harm the eggs, but he sure was confused about it for a while and really puzzled and he hadn't expected to hear me say such a thing.]

What's this? It's a big fat white lizard. Oh no, he's morphing into a fat white Illuminati hybrid, you know, those chubby Brothers with red borders around the eye like some kind of inflamed eyes.

I wanted to say, excuse me. - the fat white lizard says
I wanted to eat your babies with him. - fat lizard, "him" is Prince Charles [ADDED same day: fat lizard meant that fat lizard wanted to eat babies that are fathered by Prince Charles; fat lizard did not say that Prince Charles would be eating the babies together with fat lizard, just to be clear about what was actually said here]
Does, Prince Charles know about this? - me
Yes, he and his mother know both. - fat lizard
I want you to go away. I want you to go to hell in fact. Listen to me you fat lizard! - me interrupted
Cool it, Hamish says that it is ok. - fat lizard
Yes, she says she doesn't mind me, even when I smell like vomit, and she says Tik Tok! - Hamish explains to fat lizard
(Fat lizard said something about wanting to eat the kids, I forgot the exact words cause I didn't write it right away.)
Go to hell. And leave me the hell alone. I will kill myself, you hear? STOP RAPING ME!!! GET THE HELL AWAY YOU FUCKING IDIOT!! I am gonna kill you! I will kill you you fat bastard!! - me
Yes, she lets me take them? - Hamish to fat lizard, Hamish is confused, cause I "let" Hamish take victims to his favorite river to drown them and then eat them, Hamish had a mental image of him at the river with a victim
Go away. Hamish is THE ONLY ONE who gets to EAT MY EGGS! NOBODY ELSE! YOU HEAR?!! ONLY HAMISH!!! I would give my own liver to Hamish if he was hungry, BUT NOT TO YOU! YOU DON'T GET ANYTHING FROM ME! You go to hell! - me
Look, we can give you a nice house to live in. And nice earrings, and jewelry. - fat lizard
NO! I DON'T SELL MY CHILDREN TO A MURDERER!!! AND STOP TRYING TO RAPE ME before I murder someone! Go to hell you fucking idiot! - me
My eggs, .. - Hamish, he said something else too, and in my native language

Sorry about that, readers. That stupid fat bastard white Illuminati lizard, who was halfway morphing into a white fat chubby Illuminati brother with a black suit. The fat lizard started raping me with the energy, it feels almost like having sex or masturbating, only all over and in the energy and spine and arms and everywhere. Yeah, they used to call it "white silver" or whatever it was. It is rape. The Queen Mother fat lizard bitch who pretends to be, or morphs into, Queen Elisabeth does that rape often too when she visits. I am not sure if Prince Charles in some strange way is that fat white lizard or if this fat lizard is just using him to make edible children that are raped and murdered.

The rape is horrible. It is so violating. These white lizards, they somehow engage the human nervous system energy and turn it into a white sensual energy, which I guess might be pleasant if it were together with a lover and in an intimate situation, but when it is done like this, without asking, and with creeps, it is terribly hurtful and violating and I want to vomit and cry and cut myself and throw myself off the balcony just to get away. The fat lizard is showing me some white penis that he is touching, I don't know that must be a white fat Illuminati hybrid chubby brother guy cause it's not a human one, so those sensations that he is putting into me are coming from himself perhaps that he is transferring into me. Why they rape me? To get me pregnant and then eat the children? Or to also somehow use my body's energy to intensity these sensations so that they are raping me? It is so terribly violating.

The fat Queen Elizabeth lizard used to do this to me often and I had forgotten all about it.

My eggs. - Hamish in my native language
Hamish... Please don't let them hurt me. Please, Hamish? I let you take the eggs, because you need them to eat. But I don't want anyone else to eat them. - me
But they gave me that? - Hamish shows me a red ball made out of a gem, which has silver wire around the outside, it is perfectly clearly something that royalty would have, used to be held in the hand, it had been given to Hamish at least to borrow

If it wasn't that David Icke has written about this same stuff, I would think I am going crazy. But the use of Prince Charles, Queen Elizabeth, the fat white lizards, them raping people and then eating the children, this is all well-known prevalent concepts in the Agenda. I'm lucky I didn't vomit, cause this stuff is just sick. I don't know if the actual human (or "human"?) royal persons are personally involved, or if the aliens are just using these personas in order to impersonate royalty.

I mean, we see a fat white lizard who can shapeshift and morph. I have seen them morph from a naked fat white lizard, into the fat Illuminati hybrid men who wear a black suit, and further into a human men in black. They energy-rape people to steal a person's energy, it is very violating and it leaves the back and spine and nervous system of the victim feeling drained. They suck out the vitality force from a person through this energy rape thing, it is terribly violating and offensive.

We don't want to be rude. - the fat lizard Illuminati hybrid morph in-between says
Go to hell, please. Or I will kill something. Do you want me to die? - me
No. - the fat morph says

These lizards like to pretend to be English royalty, but they have also used Swedish royalty personas. My theory is that they are pretending to be royalty in order to be honored (not that people honor royalty anymore these days, I mean who does?, they're just people, they're perhaps not dishonored but you know what I mean, it's not like what the lizards think it is). I mean in my book royal humans are just everybody but with an interesting family history and lots of money and a nice house, but I wouldn't treat them any worse or better than anyone else in the world, which is a good thing actually, cause that means you see the person they are. People who go all nuts about royalty or celebrities omit the fact that these are persons. I don't overreact about famous people either, and that's a good thing, I'm sure famous people would appreciate that.

Why do fat white lizards pretend to be Queen Elizabeth and Prince Charles? And why is it a rusty red brown fat lizard who pretends to be the husband of Queen Elizabeth? Remember Brutus? Picture and story here. By the way, follow that link to see a drawing of Brutus. I never drew a fat white lizard, but the fat white lizards look just like this rusty brown fat lizard Brutus, only a different color.

This is so weird and gross. Luckily fat lizard left and there is no images of Prince Charles shown to me or any of that weird gross Illuminati stuff. It is said, by those who know about the Agenda, that the royal families are part of the "bloodline", meaning genetically linked to these lizards. The Bush family and other non-royal families supposedly are also part of the bloodline. My children were going to be part of the bloodline had I not escaped from that Free Mason guy who they wanted me to marry and have kids with. They say I am bloodline because far back in my family lineage was the "crazy Tsar" or whatever it was (I'd have to look back in earlier notes) who made tons of babies with tons of women in Russia and related countries. Of course I have no idea about being related to such a person, I don't know my family history.

Fat white lizard stopped energy molesting me minutes ago and seems to be gone. Why can't they ask before molesting someone's energy? Why wouldn't he first of all be himself. If

I liked to play snooker, I said to you. And, Hey! It is me, that guy you said is your Brother! - the IM hybrid man says, in a black suit
How come you morph into a white lizard? How come you shapeshift? - me
What do you like better then, eh? - IM man
The real you. I want the truth. Stop faking what you look like. - me
We don't want to be your brothers anymore. - someone dark and sinister, or the IM

This IM is the guy who drove me in the car and later said he likes to play snooker. I mean, if they want to energy rape me, then why not try to form a relationship with me and make it intimate and cozy? Why rape someone instead of making the person comfortable with them first? I mean it's violence that could be avoided, perhaps. What gives a fat lizard the right to energy molest someone? What makes them think that it's ok? Why won't they ask first? Why do they choose to hurt someone's feelings and make them feel terrible? Are they that selfish and self-centered? Why did he have to ruin my day? At least I can forget about this incident, just like I had forgotten all the previous ones and then go on with my life as if it hadn't happened. Just like I did before.

I don't want Hamish to let them get to me. So far, I let Hamish eat the eggs, but that's because Hamish needs to eat snacks and livers and I haven't figured out any other food source for my Dragon. I can't let my Sock Turtle starve. But I'm not going to give anything to those fat lizards, I owe them nothing. Hamish on the other hand I love.

PS. The fat white lizard insinuated when he mentioned Prince Charles that the fat lizard himself and the Prince are not the same person but it seems that they might be using him to make children, that are then eaten by lizards. I also want to say that I have had conversations with the Prince Charles person who looks to be and acts like the real human one. I've written those talks down but haven't published them out of fear for repercussions to me or to him or whatever, but he talks a lot about how he likes to drive the countryside in old British cars, he talks about his mother, about his life, all sorts. I also have conversations I wrote down with the Queen Elizabeth lizard person creature, she talks about her rose garden, various things, I also haven't published those anywhere. It's all weird, I don't know why the space lizards are doing this. Well, I do know that it's all got to do with food. It's weird stuff, isn't it. I didn't invent any of this, I just write down what the Reptilians do and what they say.

My scales, were on my back, good. - Hamish about his red back scales, just as I thought and almost wrote *At least Hamish is cute.*
My brothers, were semen-makers. - Hamish about the white lizard
*big sigh* Hamish. I don't know what's going on. - me interrupted by Hamish
My throats! - Hamish, meaning his food of course, he opened his mouth
Hamish... This is weird. I don't understand, what the fuck you're doing to me. I don't even ever get to meet you. - me
Do you think you're the only one we've done this to? - fat white lizard IM hybrid morph in-between
And what is "this", that you do to people? What are you doing exactly? - me
Please, stop calling me fat. - the IM hybrid form says
Then what are you? What are you doing? Don't touch me again, don't rape me ever again, don't show me Prince Charles. I only wanted to help Hamish. He is my Sock Turtle. I love that Dragon Turtle so much. But I don't want to be raped. So. What's this deal about Prince Charles? - me
He is one of ours. - fat IM morph
What does that mean? What does that mean, exactly? That he is one of yours? How is he one of yours? Is he a lizard perhaps? - me
He makes food for us! - fat morph
So. He is an abductee who is getting raped too, then is he huh? - me
Yes, he is the father of many here. - fat morph
That's offensive. I'm sorry to hear that, on his behalf. - me
Do you know who she is? - fat morph winks his eyebrows at me as he shows me an image of Prince Charles' girlfriend you know that woman he dated after Diana died
And Jackie Onassis? - fat morph

Ok, Googled it, the woman is Camilla Duchess of Cornwall.

Ok, fat lizard. This is getting very uncomfortable. I made a vow three years ago to ... - me, why am I telling him this? [ADDED later same day: I was going to say that I made a vow three years ago to write down and carefully document this alien contact, and that it was getting uncomfortable and difficult to do since the aliens involve real people into this with negative insinuated associations.]
I told you, I am not fat. - fat morph
It's just a name I picked up for you. - me
I don't want to mate with you anymore. - fat morph
IT WAS RAPE, YOU FAT BASTARD! You call that mating? It's raping. Get your words straight. You have to ask for permission first. From me, you ask permission, and then I say no, go to hell you fat bastard rapist idiot. - me
I am not a fat bastard rapist idiot. - fat morph
Yes you are. - me
Hamish told me it was ok! - fat morph upset
Hamish doesn't own me. Hamish is not my pimp. - me

And Hamish whispers something to me I didn't hear the words, then he says he is going to hide in my bedroom closet and he wants to go there, it felt as if Hamish felt awkward and ashamed, he has never - not once in our three years together - reacted this way, as if humiliated and wanting to hide. Maybe he feels that he made a mistake.

I am sorry Hamish, don't feel bad. - me
You called him fat bastard because of me. And then he was mad at me. He told me I could have the crown, if I got to you. And then, you called him fat bastard. - Hamish, he showed me mental image of a royal crown out of silver with a red interior
Hamish? Are you ok darling? My Sock Turtle? - me
Yes-No, I was not ok. - Hamish still hiding in the closet
Darling? Hamish Darling? My Sock Turtle? Are you safe? Are you ok? I love you? I would do anything for you Hamish, please don't be hurting, don't be afraid I love you Hamish. - me
My Sock, Turtle, feet, Yes-No. - Hamish shows me his flat feet, he means that his feet are not that, or are not called that

I just felt into the image of Camilla and it morphed into a black reptilian. I started to say "Aww, Lizard!" to it as if it were cute, and it said like "Don't say that to me, you stupid woman!" I continued to say aww cute lizard nicely to it and then it felt relieved that I wasn't angry to find it there. So I don't know what is going on. Are the royalty black and white lizards in disguise? Swedish King and Queen would be black reptilians each, Queen Elizabeth white lizard, Camilla a black reptilian. I don't know. I am only relaying what I see and hear from these Reptilians. Thank god for David Icke so I'm off the hook for discovering this. And I come to this independently. It's not like I listen to Icke and expect to find the same, quite the contrary, who expects to find this stuff?

So let's talk to the black reptilian who was hiding behind the image of Camilla.

Hello lizard. - me to black reptilian in Camilla
I will send my guards to you. Get out. - black lizard hiding in image of Camilla (BLC)
Why are you hiding inside of the - me interrupted from "image of Camilla?"
We want children, that is why. We are hiding here to make them. We need them here, to survive. We make them here, many of them. So? Were you worried about that? - BLC feels relieved when he starts talking and I feel that he loves to tell me this because it is important to them
So, why do you, I mean, do you - me interrupted "pretend to be Camilla?"
We take her eggs. - BLC said "her eggs" or "their eggs" with Camilla included, I forgot which he said when I started typing
But, that's rude. I'm sure she would love her own babies. - me
The royalty are made for that. That's why they were initiated here. To be protected always! So we told the human people that they were important. - BLC
And then we stole their, liver snacks. - Hamish probably, from the sounds of it, or otherwise another dark reptile
So. Royalty were just humans that the Reptilians wanted to keep for food-making - me interrupted
Yes, think of it as a really good brewery. - BLC about beer
So by convincing humanity that royal families are somehow "important", you get them to live protected lives so that your eggs are safe? Is that it? - me
Well, not exactly. She is our queen too. She made us, that is why. - someone speaks, I am shown a fat white lizard Queen Elizabeth on a throne with a scepter and the crown with red interior
So? How does this work? - me
You only need to know about the eggs, the eggs. - black someone, the second eggs was in my native language
I don't want you to have a ring on your finger, for anyone else. - Hamish with mental image of gold wedding ring on a finger (Aha! I now remember! After I had watched that love scene on the film I had stepped away from the computer for a while and told Hamish that I am going to get married one day! That is why he reacted!)
So. I hate to ask, and I really hate to have this conversation now, but, how does it work. Are the royalty also reptilians somehow, superimposed? What is going on? How does it work. - me
Your armadillo doesn't want to be afraid of me anymore. - black figure who is like a Dark Lord, "armadillo" in my other language, he means Hamish of course, he always calls him that
Don't hurt or frighten my Hamish. Hamish is the love of my life. Don't hurt him. Or I will avenge. - me
With what? - the black figure
With anything I have. - me
We have killed many for less. - the black figure, who is a Dark Lord, he thought image of outer space with big rocks suspended in space, he was quick to say
.. Hamish is my love. Please protect him for me. I love him endlessly much, I always will. I love him. That is all you need to know. Love is the glue of the universe. - me
Bah, don't tell me about that! I know nothing about that. - Dark Lord

I hate the way this story drags in actual people. It makes me worry for repercussions, people could sue, or what if my writing has repercussions to their lives. All I do here is write down what Reptilians do, and say. That is all I've done. I wish they didn't involve real people, like Colin Powell, John Kerry, royalty, now even Camilla. I'm really sad and sorry about that. But, it's what Reptilians do and say. I am not responsible for it. Let's check on Hamish first before I sign out:

Hamish? Are you ok Darling? I love you. - me
Hamish comes up close to me as if he put one of his hands on my shoulder, and he thinks about how he has a green Dinosaur, if not a couple of Dinosaurs, around him. Everything seemed to be fine.
I was feeling better now thanks! - Hamish with those big yellow bulging eyes like headlights of a car
I wanted to be with/see with my snacks! - Hamish seems pleased
My Sock Turtle. I will always take care of you. I don't care about anything else. - me
My Sock, Feet, Yes, No! - Hamish pleased he shows me the mental image of a white sock with two red stripes around the ankle of the sock, then the image of his flat red duck foot, and what he said and meant was that he is not wearing any socks
I don't smell good like a perfume. - Hamish
But Hamish. I don't mind your smell! I want you to come close to me! - me
My eggs! - Hamish about my womb area, he said while I was still talking
Hamish! I won't ever stop loving you. I am very close to you, it is personal and it is deep. And that love for you it will never stop. - me
Do you want her to talk to you like that? - Dark Lord asks Hamish
Yes, that is why I told her Yes, No, Sock Feet. - Hamish answers to Dark Lord, again with mental image of the sock and of his red foot
Hamish. You are the sweetest thing I ever knew. You are a beautiful living person. - me
She has never known anyone with a back turtle before, she said! And yes, I was very proud of my back. It was made to me, to be selfish. I was proud of it. And, with eggs. - Hamish, he points to his back, he talked first to the other ones, he said "eggs" in my native language, and with the last two sentences, his eyes closed like a nesting pigeon all cozy and snug

Like two minutes later:
She has seen you. - someone to fat lizard IM morph
Oh god, we need more Rohypnol! - fat lizard IM morph

*Don't worry about my safety. I'm perfectly fine. I manage to forget these incidents fine. Life turns back to normalcy with me and my friendship with Hamish, it will just be Hamish and me and I don't even think about fat white lizards, royalty, babies, or any of the sort. It's just me and Hamish and other things in real life. I'm not upset or crying or sad or anything, it goes away every time when it is over. I'm not going over any balconies or anything, I just say things like that to throw a tantrum at the fat bastard lizard shits.

My Cutie-Pie Loves Liver Snacks

December 12 2014, 4:01 PM - Today I was sorting some papers. Most papers went into a "keep" pile, a few of them into a "trash" pile. I wasn't aware that Hamish was watching me closely, in fact I had forgotten all about Hamish for that moment. Then he watches me select one paper to put into the trash pile, he says "Yes-No", and his Yes refers to the keep papers and No to the one I have chosen to discard.

It is interesting how his mind works. When he thinks that something is "No", he compares it to something else that is "Yes". His mind's definition of a "No" means that compared to something else that is Yes, it is a No. Get it? Humans don't think that way. That is why he says Yes-No, when what he means is a No.

Yes-No, that is not why I do it. I say Yes, then I say No. Get it? - Hamish
*laugh* Hamish? But why do you say Yes-No? Why do you do it that way? I don't understand, I mean I'm trying to understand. - me

But he always does that. Sometimes he has been watching me very closely and attentively for hours and been quiet and then he sees me put something in the trashcan, he will immediately jump at that opportunity to speak "Yes-No", where Yes are perhaps things on the desk and the No is for what I put in the trash.

I didn't mate with you to get livers. I did it for my own, reasons that were mine. Mine!, I said! - Hamish says as I was watching these pictures that I made of him and I was feeling all sentimental as if I were watching old photos of him
... Wait, what? Did you mate with me?? What! - me
It says that there. - Hamish, he refers to the drawing of him where he carries me
It says, Tik Tok. - Hamish about that picture, this picture called "Carried"

Tik Tok means like "would you have sex with me?", he says that to the yellow dragon turtle lady or was it she who said it to him when they were going to make a nest of eggs together. I'm pretty sure that Tik Tok ("have sex with me") and Tok Tok ("come here to see me") are words derived from actual sounds of varieties of palate click vocalizations that these turtle dragons make. Just like the Dinosaur language, featuring Deb Deb, Dib, Dab, Dam, must be derived from the Dinosaur chirping language (which sounds adorable I must say).

Well. That's Hamish. He's just left me confused. Did he just say that he had sex with me? When? I know he once offered to, I forget what the context was, I wrote it somewhere on the website that time when he asked me to get down on his ruggy rugs for sex, but that was probably because of something I said, hey maybe even I had told him I was needy for some man who knows. But Hamish doesn't act sexual toward me.

[Added same day: We did not then, nor have we ever, had sex. However on our first getting acquainted back in August 2011 when he wrestled me "to show power" it was associated with intensely pleasurable sexual and orgasmic sensations that he somehow was able to produce for me, or for both of us, but it doesn't involve sexual contact. I suspect that these powerful sexual feelings are what Reptilians refer to as, and I quote, "feelings of power", perhaps an orgasmic lusty sensory reward that they have for dominating another individual, which might in part explain why Reptilians are so driven toward dominance. That somehow in their evolutionary path

Tik Tok. It was not my mother's fault. - Hamish, meaning about evolution as to why they do dominance behavior

That somehow in their evolutionary path their body ended up with sensory reward for dominance, whereas we humans have ended up with sensory reward for reproduction (sex), eating sugar, fat, and salt. Might I also add that the Reptilian "feelings of power" are at leats 1000 times more pleasurable than any sexual feeling I ever had as a human being. And when they wrestle me I get to feel it together with them. Regretfully, each Reptilian individual, for some unknown reason, will only wrestle me once and then never again for the rest of our time together, not even a pinch or a hint of such. And that they wrestle me after first watching me for about two days closely, then they jump on me and do it. I also add that it doesn't involve their sexuality or reproductive behavior, i.e. their penis which is normally hidden on the inside of their body does not come out. This "Reptilian sex" is not associated to reproductive or genital behavior at all, it is purely about dominance. /end of addition]

I must add. Even though Hamish watches me because of the eggs, it's not that he thinks of me as some female dragon turtle. He doesn't do sexual behavior toward me. When Hamish is going to have sex with a female turtle dragon, I know that part of it is that he will massage her back first by stepping up and down slowly on the back with his flat red duck feet. We often see Hamish doing that kind of stepping on shedded scales on a rug, or on a soft plush rug. But he doesn't ever intend to do that to me. I don't know, I'm confused as to what he meant by that comment about sex and about livers. I know he eats livers, livers are his favorite "lunches and snacks" (he just did a palate click cause I wrote that).

Yesterday I told Hamish that I wish I could live with him and just feed him with liver snacks all day, but I told him it would be cow or pig liver, he seemed more keen on it being pig liver than on the cow liver. But when I told him about giving him "liver snacks", his body had an automatic response where he opened his mouth as if to eat. Sort of when you offer a human some cake their mouth might start salivating and stomach secreting acid preparing for the meal. Hamish has those responses too, in that he will open his mouth if you offer him snacks, even if the snacks aren't there yet. (He also chooses to open his mouth at times when he is showing power, seemingly at times of insecurity about his security or dominance, or if he is feeling irritated.)


Hamish? Do you know why I love you? - me
Yes-No, Kissy. - Hamish calmly says, because I almost said Kissy Feet again
Why Yes-No Kissy Feet? Wouldn't you let me kiss your feet if I was there? I like your feet Hamish, they're cute. - me
Hamish leans one way, does a palate click, then leans back the other way, does a palate click.
Yes, that is how I said that they were cute. With palate clicks, I said them. That it was cute, I said. - Hamish

Next time I want to tell him that his feet are cute, I will first lean left or right, do a palate click, then lean the other way and do a palate click, while showing him a mental image of his flat red feet. (He first showed me a mental image of his feet standing in the shallow water of his favorite creek, before he did this leaning and palate click gesture.)

Hamish? Can I come with you to your river and spend time with you there? - me, he shows me the image of a carcass on the rocks of that creek on the dry shore and it is open and he has the tasty orange liver there
I don't want to eat your snacks. - me, Hamish thinks of his mouth and of eating juicy organ meats
Hamish? Do you eat muscle meat at all? Or only soft organs? - me
Hamish gives me a gesture without words that conveys that he also ingests blood.
Yes-No only soft organ meats. - Hamish, meaning that he doesn't just eat organ meats
... Can I come with you to your river, when you bathe your feet? - me
Yes-No. - Hamish (Yes-No means No, pure and simple, if anyone forgets that)

He's such an amazing creature. He is bright almost neon fire engine red with orange, those orange blunt buttons along the back of his neck, and his smell like a visceral smell of vomit and old cheese. And then he is so cute, the things he says, the things he does. His sensitive flat duck feet on a rug or in the water on soft rocks. Palate clicks, grunts, grunt-purrs, and the way his lower eyelids close up if he is happy or amused, his upper eyelids close diagonally down if he is humble or grateful. I love him.

All sorts

December 10 2014, 4:35 PM - Yesterday they showed me mental images of a hybrid creature that was presumably made from my egg. This batch of hybrids is the recent, or current, batch. They look odd, they don't seem to be very intelligent or living. The skin is white and almost translucent like squid, the body shape varies a bit but can be insectoid to humanoid. The eyes are Thuban type eyes with a large black pupil, no colored irises, and the eye itself is like a fish eye. Their father is the Japanese humans. And then of course with some alien DNA, either Zeta or possibly Thuban. They tend to have black hair from their Japanese parent.

This one was humanoid, he wore those blue shorts and white t-shirt and suspenders just like my other Japanese hybrid boys do over there in the Japanese bases. These kids they go to school there and everything. This boy was flying a kite and playing. Then Hamish played with him, the boy told me that Hamish played with him so that he would dare to come close to Hamish. Hamish pulled the boy right up against his chest. I knew Hamish was going to drag this boy-creature down to the river and push his head down under the water to drown him, after that Hamish would eat various assortment of his organs. I told Hamish that this was my boy and that Hamish could not eat him. I said he was mine.

The boy told me that earlier he had played with some blocks, what seemed from his mental images to have been wooden blocks of various sizes and colors. I asked him to tell me how he had played with them, had he stacked them up on top of each other in various ways? He wouldn't say, but he told me that Hamish had taken all of the red blocks from him. Hamish has a habit of taking red toys away from the hybrid children, there is especially that rather large red truck car that the hybrid boys love to sit on and push with their feet to drive, Hamish likes to claim it as his own and take it away from the kids. This boy was 5 years old, they said to me.

General Davies, it was one of the Generals from my team and I'm not 100% sure anymore which of the Generals but I'm almost sure it was General Davies, he came in for a visit. I happened to be naked in the bath at the time. But anyway they were here to defend me from the aliens. I woke up later from my sleep only to find that a military person was watching over me and that he probably had all night, when I asked this man who he is he said he is an "Agent". I think the Reptilians might have hurt or killed or eaten me many times over had not the kind military guys protected me, but they never take any credit for it, they are silent heroes they defend humanity as best as they can.

About that Colin Powell. Here's the thing. Last night I was shown a Colin Powell but he did not have that magnificent golden Ancient Egyptian royalty energy and vibe about him. This was just a plain human man Colin Powell. So, here's the thing, the aliens told me that the real Colin Powell had been taken away and that a clone had been made to replace him and so the Colin Powell that we think is him is just a clone and this clone one also has tons of children in the Agenda. That's what the aliens told me, I'm not making this up. Remember when I wrote to you guys that President Obama had also been made into a clone and that the real one is alive somewhere else and this impostor clone is running the world this way? I know I am not allowed to write about this stuff. [Added same day: The real Colin Powell said that the only thing he misses is Skittles, which is an American candy, over where he is. Real or not, I don't want to have anything to do with it.]

I mean, the Dark Lords and Black Reptilian like to tell me their plans. It's like in cartoons when the evil bad guy always reveals his plans even when he should keep them a secret. The rulers of the Agenda love to tell me all of the high level top secret plans, and I keep thinking like hey why are you telling me I'm just a girl? But here's the thing, I'm a type of clone too. I'm one of these specially made people that are placed out here in the world in the aliens' master plan. I am one too.

Let's analyze. Clones can be made. These aliens want to take

Psstt, we already have taken over. - Dark Lord
Don't you know that yet? - Dark Lord adds

These aliens want to take over the world, I was going to say.

Yes and we don't mind you writing about it, it's what we want to do. Tell them all that they are our goats! We make them suffer here! - Dark Lord

Clones can be made and the aliens want to take over the world. So it is plausible. Whether it has been done or not I don't know. I'm not the right person to be writing this stuff. I just started a documentary to share with the world what the aliens tell me, and this is what they told me.

General Patton also said hi yesterday about the same time when General Davies did. The Zetas asked me if I would go to their zoo. They have a zoo where they keep at least one human young man naked. There is fake grass and a fake tree and a fake sky. It's ridiculous. The Zetas want me to think that I am an animal. They tell the hybrid children that I am a giraffe, or a cat. They also say that humans are elephants, lions, dogs. It's not necessary, and really it's rude. Zetas will also do MKULTRA tactics to really make an abductee adopt an animal persona. Remember that time when I went nuts and went to the shop and got all kinds of leopard print clothes? Luckily I snapped out of that the same day.

I had baths yesterday and that is why I got to see the Dinosaur. They love baths more than anything it seems. A Dinosaur always lets me see it in a mental image and comes to talk and look closely at my bathtub and usually he also says Deb Deb! Dinosaur told me his race is from Alpha Draconis, when I asked where they are from. But they are not Reptilians, they don't have a tail. Dinosaurs are cute, Hamish often calls them Frogs. Often the aliens show me a vivid mental image of a frog, a real earth frog, either in someone's hand or falling down into my hand, when it's time for the Dinosaurs to come for a visit. Of course it makes me delighted! What could be more delightful than frogs and Dinosaurs? Dinosaurs are skinny green and they never seem to wear any clothes.

Today I asked Dinosaur if he would do me a favor and tell Hamish that I love Hamish, and so Dinosaur just say to Hamish "Deb", and I said, "Is that it?"

Yesterday someone made telepathic contact with Hamish but I won't write any names here. I did my best to get Hamish to talk to them, but instead Hamish opened his mouth wider than I've ever seen him do before. When Hamish faces a person and opens his mouth at them it means perhaps insecurity or that he is making a threat. He has done that even to me a few times if I'm trouble. But this time his mouth opened so much even up to his nostrils and hiding his face, so I figured that Hamish was feeling very insecure about the people. These were people from Earth contacting him, probably they have read this website here. I told them to get acquainted with Hamish first, I suggested to them that they honor his back and scales and things like that.

It is tricky to get acquainted with Hamish in the beginning, but once I made friendship with him he's just the best. He's my pooch. I have started narrating Hamish for him, he likes that. It can sound like this: "Hamish likes liver snacks, he said. And Hamish is a proud race and back shield, said Hamish." Just like the way he likes to narrate, I do it to him too and he likes it. Today he said "snacks" and as he said it there was a palate click at the same time. I was thrilled.

The other day they showed me the Japanese men again, a man who they said is a Samurai, I said is he really? Hamish showed me this man's house in Japan, it is a charming very traditional Japanese house, not black with white, but white with brown or beige wooden beams. The man was in his house sitting on the floor by a low table with his legs crossed. I asked why don't they use any chairs? This man seemed to fear Hamish, when Hamish comes up close to him he is startled about it. I told him that Hamish is my best friend in the world. I guess you have to be a woman if you are going to treat Hamish like a puppy kitty cat. Maybe men find my Hamish scary, but I think he's cute. They also showed me that Japanese man whose name I forgot, you know the one who is part of the Dragon Dynasty clan and is a bit older maybe in his 50's and has a ton of children all over the place? I don't know Hamish what things you are dragging me to. At least you're cute.

I'm thinking of getting Hamish some wrapped Christmas presents to put under the tree. He might like the dog squaky chicken chew toy and some red Christmas tree ball ornaments for Christmas. I wish it could just be Hamish and me. I wish I could have a house with a big garden together, we would have gold fish and koi in the pond, and some turtles. I could feed him liver snacks all day long, and Hamish would do palate clicks and purr. And a nice creek where Hamish can dip his duck feet in, nice rugs everywhere all over the place. And no onions.

Yes-No, Eggs

December 09 2014, 8:44 PM - I am watching a tv series and a woman is upset at a guy and yells at her and pushes her out the front door and slams the door shut. When Hamish sees that scene, he says: "Yes-No, Eggs". He is probably thinking that the man isn't going to get any eggs.

Hamish is adorable. I've been cooing at him all day, "Hamish you're so cute!", "Hamish I love you!", and such. Today I took a bath and - as always - the Dinosaur was excited. Dinosaurs love to see me take a bath, probably because they love to bathe themselves too. I love my Dragon, he is too cute for words.

Ahem, no

December 08 2014, 1:58 PM - Translated from my other language just now:

Would you like a dildo? - Hamish
We haven't given you one in a long while. - Hamish
Yes-No. I don't want one. - me
And I think that is very offensive. - me
So that you don't go with some man. - Hamish
So that I can have my snacks. - Hamish

Explanation for those of you who don't know Hamish: Hamish is a Draconian reptile. His job is to guard my eggs from being stolen by other alien teams, or from being fertilized if I have sex with a man. His incentive is that the aliens make hybrid babies out of my eggs, and Hamish gets to eat some of those creatures as his "snacks". Hamish forbids me from even contemplating on going on a date. So it goes without saying that I've been single for a long time. For the record I don't own any sex toys or a dildo, but I suspect that the aliens might have some.

A few minutes after:

Hamish was talking to me about "his eggs" and he told me that he knows that I have masturbated recently, like a few days ago. Now he came up to me and started sniffing toward my groin, sniffing carefully unlike he usually does. "What are you smelling?", I ask him, wondering what the smell is even though I know it must be "the eggs". Hamish can pick up scents about me that I have no idea about. After half a minute pause which seems like a long silence, he says that I smell different, meaning different than I usually do.

You don't have your menses. Tik Tok, that is not what I meant. - Hamish
No. I didn't think so either. What does it smell like then? - me
Like the eggs are faring well with you. That is what it meant. That it was not, Yes-No, meant. Just that the eggs was with Hamish's. I have taken them, from the groin. - Hamish

I haven't had my morning shower today but maybe I should. I didn't think I needed a shower just yet but we can't have Hamish picking up scents, maybe if I have a shower we can have some normalcy again so that I can get back to reading my book. Life with a Dragon, I'm not making this up.

Close to Hamish

December 07-08 2014, 12:04 midnight - I have had a beautiful fire engine red orange large reptile person watching me closely all day. Now and then he will watch closely toward my groin or womb area and talk in thoughts not human earth language words about the eggs that are there, and check to see at between my legs without touching me just to see if there are any eggs or white embryos that might have fallen out which they haven't. He stares at me closely everything I do. I see him watching me closely and staring at me with big bulging yellow eyes with a narrow brown vertical slit, keen eyes, not a dumb creature, but certainly not a human, because he does not respond affectionately when I express to him that he is cute and that I would like to give him a hug, he just stays the same as before I said anything of the sort.

His movements are quick and slick, he tends to lean his body left, then right, as if a person looking to see something from behind a crowd, only there is no crowd or much of anything between us that would be blocking his sight, yet he leans like that just to make sure that he can see clearly. His attention span never fades, he watches keenly without being distracted. He stares at me with incessant curiosity. If a human were staring at someone, you would think that after a few hours he would get bored or tired or start to look around elsewhere or start to sigh. No, this dragon person is still ever as keen as he started out being, staring at me with wide open yellow eyes, as if every second mattered. Humans do not possess such attention span or tireless focus and fixation. He stares, Hamish just stares at me all day today.

There was no perfume here, that I liked. - says Hamish now, he means the jasmin perfumated object I have put in my room since only yesterday or the day before
I am sorry Hamish. I can take the perfume out if you wish. I want you to be comfortable here. Hamish is my friend here. - me
My eggs! - Hamish speaks clearly
Yes. - me
They have not been washed today. - Hamish about eggs
I think I had a shower today? Is that what you mean? A shower? - me
Yes-No, that is not what I meant. I meant, with Hamish's eggs, lunches. - Hamish

He is the cutest thing you would ever see. Bright, almost neon or glowing fire engine red with orange. The most beautiful handsome reptilian person. Sometimes he stands upright and tall, so that his outline is somewhat that of a human, only he is much larger than a human, and his tail is limp it rests down against the floor motionless.

I was not incessantly here. It was just that perfume I didn't like. So, away with it. Yes, she said yes to me. My eggs. - Hamish, "eggs" in my native language

When I see him, this magnificent handsome fire engine red Dragon Man, I react fondly, I tell him he is cute (interrupted)

My perfume was also not good, you have said! So, I was not incessantly here. My attention span is not good, they have said. - Hamish
Hamish, you smell good. Like a Dragon Turtle. I don't mind your smell, Hamish's perfume. - me
Yes-No, palate click! - Hamish

Seeing this big bright orange red dragon person just staring at me with wide open yellow bulging eyes and such curiosity, I talk to him, I tell him he is handsome, and that I love him so much, that I want to hug him. But he doesn't react. He doesn't let me hug him. There is no feedback given to my splurge of affection. And so it leaves this gap between us, where he remains staring at me, and I remain flooded with emotion which was not responded to, and then there is silence, with a big dragon turtle staring at me with great curiosity and calm, and me with so many emotions that were not answered to, and we just look at each other.

Yes-No!, incessantly! - Hamish upset about the perfumated object in my room, he thought a mental image to it
I will take it away, Hamish. I will leave it to some other room. Forgive me for the perfume. Hamish has a sensitive nose. - me
Yes-No incessantly, that. - Hamish meaning the perfumated object that it should not have a fragrance incessantly forever
I will take it away. I promise you I will put it away somewhere, forgive me Hamish for putting it there. You are more important to me than perfume. - me
Did you want to watch me eat the eggs you said? - Hamish, that I would have said this to him (he narrates), meaning the two eggs I fried earlier this evening, he thought an image about that
Yes Hamish. You watched me eat some eggs. - me
I wasn't fried with those, that. - Hamish points to the mental image of the frying two eggs from today
... No. Hamish wasn't fried. Not Hamish. - me
I wasn't washed with them. - Hamish
Ok Hamish. Ok. - me

He stares. He doesn't respond to my requests of getting to hug him. He doesn't react to when I shower him with words of affection. It is the most uncanny alien encounter, with this dragon person

Yes-No! I was not an alien. I was with Hamish's voice. - Hamish

When you're with a human, they respond to your words and behavior. Here is this large fire engine red Dragon person, and he does nothing when I express words or behavior toward him. It is uncanny, it is weird, strange, how he will just stand there watching me curiously. A conscious person, a somebody in those eyes, in that large fire engine red naked scaly body with a limp tail, large wide open yellow eyes watching me, a proportionally tiny head. I see and I sense that he is a conscious person, more so than a human. You can tell when you look at him that he is a "somebody" standing there, yet he doesn't respond when I speak to him my words of affection, so there is this awkward silence and strange situation between us. The encounter of Hamish is very strange and odd. He just looks at me. He is a person, but he is not a human.

Yes-No, my eggs, I said. - Hamish
Have you caught a whiff of him? He thinks you don't want to. - black reptile tells me
That Hamish has a bad smell. - Hamish or the black reptile
I have smelled Hamish today. He smells fine. Hamish smells good like a Dragon. - me

Today he has been very close and very curious, and I have even caught his body odor from this contact today. Normally on a day to day basis I don't get to experience Hamish's smell. But today I have. Today it was something that was probably a scent of his droppings that has lingered on about his body, nothing offensive whatsoever, but clearly a smell. I do wish Hamish would award me more closer contact. I love having him near. He is so intoxicatingly handsome. Now they show me one of my daughters that are human or mostly human, with long sleek black hair, fathered by a Japanese man.

I don't want to see them. I only want to see Hamish. No children here, just Hamish and me together, nobody else thanks. Nobody else but me and him. - me
My bulging eyes, she said to me. - Hamish says probably to the girl about me

I implode every time I feel love toward Hamish. A human heart was made to feel love and affection toward a person. But Hamish doesn't interact with me or respond to me in a way that would give me an outlet of my emotions. So I am sitting here and he is watching me and it is hurting me inside because I love him so much and I can't put that love anywhere else besides in me. I have never felt so much love toward a human, or to an animal like a pet. I love him so much that it hurts. Because in him I see that he is a person. I love him so much it moves me to tears. I love him more than my own life. He is such a beautiful dragon, such a wonderful marvellous person. He is such a beautiful body and a beautiful conscious individual.

Hamish is, Yes. - Hamish
Hamish is Yes. My Hamish. - me
My Eggs were here, you said! - Hamish
My Hamish was here. - me
I wanted to take them. - Hamish or black reptilian
The Zeta Reticulan were here. - Zetas

I am drowning in a sea of love toward this being. Meanwhile he just stares at me without emotion, only with curiosity and focused attention and calm. I could put a dagger to my heart just to make a statement about my love for him, it is that kind of a love.

I don't smell bad to him, he said. My eggs. - Hamish, "him" and "he" is the black reptile, and "my eggs" was said in my native language
Hamish, you smell good to me. I like when you are close. You are welcome here my darling. - me
I was with this, my eggs. - Hamish, "with this", he picks up his limp tail in his hand and lifts it up a bit to show me
I like your tail Hamish. It is a nice tail. I don't have a tail, you do, you have a tail Hamish. - me
My eggs were proud of me, she said. - Hamish declares, because of what I said (which is what the "eggs" said, he thinks; he refers to me as the eggs)

He is a big handsome gorgeous fire engine red orange dragon person. Somehow my human brain experiences an overload and a circuitry breakdown from the experience of him, because he is too adorable for words or comprehension. I love him I love him I love him. I could cry and faint and die all at the same time, but then I do none of those things, I just sit here, imploding inside and aching out of my deepest infatuation for this being called Hamish, and he looks at me, totally void of affectionate emotion, just calm, and curious, a conscious being, so beautiful.

My eggs, were in my garden! - Hamish or black reptile or both half and half in which case Hamish said "My eggs" and black one would have added "were in my garden"

He is so gorgeous my brain could explode. I die and am pieced back together again in every second, every moment that he looks at me, because I love him. I love my Hamish.

My smell was not pleasant, for my eggs. - Hamish
Your smell was good, Hamish. Hamish has a good smell, of Dragon. Hamish smells like Dragons. Hamish, the eggs said that they don't think that you smell bad. The eggs like your smell, because then they know that it is Hamish who is visiting with them. That is what they said, the eggs said that. - me
... Hamish? Why do I feel like I love you so much? Why do I love you? - me

I would kill a whole army of people just to save him. I would climb a mountain just to honor him there. I would die and survive in every moment we are together. I would turn to dust and become one of his scales that could live on his body, breathing with him, being with his mind, a piece and a part of him, and not myself, no longer myself. The telepathic link that he enables between us is so strong, and so close, that I don't want to be a human anymore. I want to walk along that link like if it were a ribbon and immerse myself with him, plunge into the soul of his body and scales and be with him for always, carried by his being and his race. I would cease all of my human thoughts and to never again take another human footstep, only to live forever after in his Hamish's every breath that he makes. His life is more important than mine, I feel that now. When I feel us both, I feel that he means more to me than even myself. He is so alive, and he has made contact with me, body and mind, that being a human means nothing to me ever after.

Why do you have this? This here? Tik Tok? - Hamish shows me the little white feather that is on my desk
It is a decoration. - me, it pains me to talk of something so mundane
I wanted to take it, and keep it. - Hamish
It is yours to take, Hamish. You may take it yes, it is yours to take you are welcome to it, take it it is yours. - me
I have shown it to my armor. - Hamish, "armor" in my other language, he means that he had shown his back shield to the feather, it is a species and dominance and superiority thing

He is such a living being, there is something beautiful about who and what he is, that renders me worthless to myself ever after. I want to be with him, but I can't. His beautiful soul, his magnificent handsome body (interrupted)

I have shown my back shield to him. - Hamish, "him" is the little white feather of course
And what did "it" say? Did it say Hamish was beautiful? - me

It feels like being gutted, like all of my innards are smeared all over, like I'm broken and nothing will ever put me back together again, because he is so beautiful. I love him more than a human was meant to love. I wasn't made for this love for a Dragon Turtle. He is more beautiful than anything on Earth.

Tell them, that we also like to fight. So, none of that nice stuff. - Hamish or black reptile for me to write here (probably the black reptile)
None of that, "implode stuff". - black reptile
I like my livers! - Hamish, and first right before he spoke I sensed the smell of what was unmistakably liver, I know because of liver pate, I know the smell of liver in liver pate, and it was the unmistakable smell of liver first, and then he said this

I love him, but I will never get to hug him, and so I will spend the rest of my life being overwhelmed, yet mildly, it kills me mildly and kindly, it both builds me and destroys me, and then it is nothing. It pulls me in two different directions, and so then I stay here and nothing happens. A lot happens, and then nothing at all happens, in my emotional world, that is overwhelmed toward Hamish. Being with him, close to him, is all what matters. Those moments are what I cherish and grasp for most of all. And the times in between those moments of being with him, are just meaningless void no matter what I might fill them with. Only being with Hamish is what matters.

A few minutes later:
My goosebumps. - Hamish says while showing me the orange zits on his arms


December 06 2014, 12:03 noon - The other day when I threw myself on the bed for a nap or a liedown during daytime, I caught Hamish alreadly lying on the bed there in the other dimension! I was so happy, I stayed in bed and moved over and told him to stay or come back. And this morning when I got out of bed for a shower Hamish was happy that I had left the bed and he was about to scurry on over there, and I was so happy about that I told him to please go ahead and use the bed.

I've been trying to get Hamish to make himself comfortable and at home here and use my bed but he just doesn't. But, when he lies on the bed, don't think of it like a long person laying on its back, no. Hamish is more like a cat. He will plummet straight down and his back puckers up like a cat that is sitting down on all fours. So a human bed isn't ideal. It is obvious even when Hamish is sitting like that on a bed that he is more for a nest, just like the rugs and scales he builds nests out of, things where he can plummet straight down like a chicken or a bird on a nest.

And when he gets down on a bed he will step with his flat red duck feet up and down like if he were building and making a nest with his feet. Last night I talked to him about his back hump, and he liked that. This morning he talked to me in some Draconian roar rumble speech about the eggs and without using human word language, it was neat. I love my Dragon so much.

Cancelled the MKULTRA date

December 03 2014, 11:04 AM - So as you read in the previous update (below) I was going on a date today. But I cancelled the date, and am about to inform the guy.

Yes. - says Hamish pleased and hints at my womb area, he said in my other language
My Red Turtle! My Hamish is here! - me
The eggs said, Yes, to me. - Hamish
Did they now? I didn't hear them talk? - me

Lo and behold, the ex I was going to go see was the Free Mason guy. Gasp. Scary, huh. But for some reason, after all this time, I was naive again and thought it might be normal and ok. Just a normal date with a guy I once knew. Well, as I went to bed the night before I would leave to go see him, FIVE!!!!!! Dark Lords show up in my bedroom BIG TIME!!! And these FIVE!!!! Dark Lords are excited cause they act like I'm coming over to their den for a rendezvous with them. They were five of them, perfect representative members of the Dark Lord species, also called Archons, Shadow Figures, Alpha Thetons, even Demons and Satan. They acted like I was going to come see them for a night out. Five of them. Five. Gasp.

I've handled one (interrupted)

You didn't want to be my concubine. I know that now. And, Gasp to that. I thought it was better written that way. That you didn't want to come?! - Dark Lord now

I've handled one Dark Lord, namely Malik also known as Betelgeuse, and we all know those stories from the early logs of The Orion Project, what a Mr. Mischief he could be. Then remember that time when I thought of the Free Mason ex and that brought Dark Lord Baphomet Basmet to see me and he enjoyed sucking out the life force out of my heart causing me serious heart problems? Yeah, that guy. Now I had five of these guys at the same time. One of them was Beelzebub, the others told me their names too when I asked, but I forgot the other four.

The thing to know about Dark Lords is that their energy is really bad. It is like stepping into a black dark world filled with pestilence and murder.

We don't like the Lotus. - Dark Lord says, he knows I like the symbol of the lotus for my forehead because the lotus flower is a good energy symbol that breaks up their bad vibes

The horrific vibe and energy of the Dark Lords cannot be overstated. It can cause a human nausea just to be near them, headaches, disease.

We are not going to keep you as a pet. - Dark Lord
You know, Fine Sir, I've told you that I love you guys respectfully, but that I am allergic. - me
Yes, indeed, no goats. - Dark Lord
No goats, no. - me
Our painstaking work might be undone here! - Dark Lord or black reptile with a wretched anguished voice

There were five of them. Their energy was horrible. They were pulling out my biological life force out of my body, and when they do - as I've told here numerous times in the documentary - they contort human life force, which they steal, into a sexual lust as they call it. And it can feel orgasmic and intoxicating for the human victim too, only, after such a sexual lust orgy with Dark Lords, a human would be left without any soul, without joy or happiness, and fully accessible for Dark Lord mind control and they might use a person for arguments, crime, murder, and Satanism.

Some people love to devote themselves to the Dark Lords, and there really is a nice allure. I almost wish that I could just "have sex" with the Dark Lords and be friends with them and do witchcraft and Satanic rituals with them, cause apart from their taste for murder and stealing your souls they are actually incredibly nice guys, funny and endlessly charming and it's easy to really fall in love with them and want to snuggle them. But, the horrible dark feelings that they leave behind are horrible, especially now when I've been apart from them for so long and have managed to build up my light (biological life force) again strong and then to lose it felt horrible in the contrast. So I wasn't going to let that happen.

I respectfully informed the five dark gentlemen that I was going to have to decline. I talked to them. They were indeed coming from the Free Mason, and they said of him that he is part of an old lineage, I said that's the Illuminati bloodline isn't it? The Dark Ones also said that they were "given to" him. So turns out these five Dark Lords were going to be part of the sexual encounter with the Free Mason again. In fact, my first weekend with the Free Mason, a Dark Lord had possessed the Free Mason man, which is why there was mostly D/s stuff and very little what we humans would call sexual activities. But it was nice, in its own way, and it was very tender and sweet with the Dark Lord.

I was with my goats then there. - Dark Lord

Is Free Masonry a Satanic cult? I have reason to suspect that. And in the past when I've told the guy about these Dark Lords, especially about Basmet Baphomet who came to me directly from his whereabouts, he says "you know we don't talk of these things". And once we were in a New Age store together and he was really looking at the pentagram necklaces. He even wanted to iron brand me with his sigil on my lower back (I haven't had that done). I do believe he is controlled by the Dark Lords who have access to his mind and behavior at times, it is evident that they do, and I think that he likes it and he lets them.

It could have been a nice time with him and with five Dark Lords in a lusty kind of Dark Lord orgy together, but in the end I would have lost the life force out of my body and that's a price I am not willing to pay. The Dark Lords are Incubi, energy parasites. So I called off the date and am reminded of why I never went back to see him, even though all these years he still continues to ask me to go back.

In the night I was woken up by what at first seemed to be a human man who was in an airplane. He had black hair and brown eyes and his face was covered in those spots you get if you had bad acne when you were young. He was on an airplane and headed to the country where I was going to meet the Free Mason, and he had woken me up telepathically from my sleep harshly and was saying "Weren't you supposed to be on an airplane?!" or something like that. Yes, I was supposed to be getting up early in the morning to go to the airport but I had woken up at the right time when my alarm went off and after the ordeal and visit with the FIVE Dark Lordships I decided to call it off and gone back to sleep.

This man said that he was going to the place where me and the man were meeting so that he would be nearby, because this man was going to train me for MKULTRA!!! Gasp! So this man was disappointed that he was now on a flight and I was not going there after all. So let me state this again, the Free Mason did mind control hypnosis MKULTRA on me when we first met. With it he was able to make me do things by using programmed code words and he could wipe things out of my memory and then take back memories to me by using other words.

So this man who made telepathic contact, and I saw him in a remote viewed image as he was on an airplane, he was telling me that he was headed to the same place so that he would be right nearby me and the Free Mason guy for mind control MKULTRA purposes. This man woke me up from my sleep to tell me wasn't I supposed to be on a flight? He said they are training me to be an "agent" for the military, he asked me if I would like to be their agent. He mind controlled me big time from the airplane from remotely, now, I was still in bed, not with the Free Mason.

This man somehow possessed my body and took me over, it feels like two people overlapping, it is very intimate and close, more intimate than having sex with someone naked belly against naked belly, it is like he is in my body and I feel him as well as I feel me. Then he can control my body, and he is much stronger than me because he is a man so he moved my arms for me and flipped my body over quite a bit. But, when I asked him if he was human or Dark Lord or alien, I was shown an outer space image of a distant star and told of how strong that star's radiation is if you come closer. I don't know for sure if this man was a human or if it was one of the Dark Lords or Orion lizards in disguise, but it was MKULTRA and the real human man Free Mason is involved in this.

We like to eat our kittens here! - says a black reptilian all pleased thinking of a fluffy white kitten

I also overheard a conversation between this human MKULTRA man who was on the plane speaking with Dark Lords, so I'm thinking that this human is human and that he is working together with Orion lizards and Dark Lords for world power. This man talked to the Dark Lords and told them that in "San Marino" in the USA (is in California) there are "plenty of Navy officers" that the Dark Lords have permission to mind control and mess with. I think this man was General Patton, the man himself, on his way to the same city where I had promised to fly to meet with the Free Mason.

General Patton is really something. From earlier conversations with him, he is one of the top men in the MKULTRA project and he has been on this project for decades. The other staff who are younger and not as experienced on his team they all worship him like a hero because he is some kind of legend over there. For years I never got to see or meet General Patton but I only got to hear about him, because sometimes the other men on the team would get all excited and say to each other "General Patton is here!", or "General Patton is on the phone!", and it was clear that he was a VIP over there. I used to ask the others on the MILABS staff "Who is General Patton?", and "Can I talk to him?", and they would never let me know a thing about him or talk to him, so he was always this mystery VIP person that I wondered about.

Then, years later, General Patton entered the scene and started training me for MKULTRA, in which he can actually from a remote place superimpose his mind with my body and it feels very close, as if our two bodies melt together, and then he can move my arms and body very effectively, and interestingly he manages to move me with his own strength of a man, a strength that my own body does not have. For instance he can make my hand make a fist that is too strong for my mere humble weak woman body so that it hurts my hand, because he is physically much stronger than me so he makes a fist like a man would do it. He is very strong, and once when he flipped my body my head bumped into the wall and it hurt a lot, but that was an accident. He doesn't do it to hurt me, he is just gradually getting me used to having him talk to me and give instructions. They want to use me as an agent. He calls me by the name Stephanie, I hate that. It is not my name. It is my agent name.

General Patton is a code name of course, named after the great American general in world war 2 I think it was. When General Patton was a young Navy officer in the 1960's if not earlier, he had been asked if he would join this MKULTRA project.

Look, now, you see, this is all very covert. I really don't want you talking about us. - General Patton says now telepathically
I'm sorry. I didn't mean any harm or damage. - me

He was a young Navy officer, it was either the Navy Seals or Coast Guard or something like that. I know what his uniform looked like, he has shown me images of himself as if from color photographs, his uniform included a cane. He worked stationed on a big Navy ship, and I think he was also in the Vietnam war or involved in it, I'll have to check the notes I'm not sure on that one about Vietnam. Anyhow, he is an alltimer MKULTRA guy and one of the mentors for the younger staff on the MILABS team. The others really look up to him. I almost feel honored that he would take the time to train me, you know. He's such an important expert over there. I don't get a whole lot of time with him, only every now and then, but now we know for sure that the Free Mason is involved. And this makes things more interesting, because the Free Mason is a real man in real life, not some telepathic contact.

It's kind of exciting. I mean, agents and stuff. Maybe I should go for it. But a key element to being a secret agent is that they would have to use mind control techniques that make me forget what they have instructed me to do. So I wouldn't know anything about what I did. Oh, this man also said that I was chosen for this project because I am a Starchild or something like that, so it seems I have some psychic powers to begin with, which probably makes me a better secret psychic agent for the military.

Gosh, what if one day I get to meet with General Patton. That would be a scary encounter, even though I try to be nice and sweet to him I mean he's quite an imposing character and the way he talks and acts around me. Is General Patton a real human man? Or is it the aliens and Dark Lords disguising themselves as humans? Or is it perhaps the other way around, are humans disguising themselves as aliens? [I seem to think that it is aliens and military working together.] It will be fun getting to know this situation more and more as time goes. It is all such a great mystery.

Now I can't wait to tell the Free Mason ex not only that I am not coming to see him, but all about the meeting with five Dark Lords and this MKULTRA mind control person at night who moved my arms and body for me and told me I could be their agent. Exciting stuff.

Bananas... what kind of bananas?

December 02 2014, 11:55 PM - So I was on the webcam and set up a date to go see one of my ex boyfriends for just one day and one night. Dinosaur shows up. Probably because Hamish is far too out of himself to take care of matters on his own. Dinosaur sits down on the sofa to look right at the very volluptuous fruit bowl I have set up there, with all kinds of real fruit. Dinosaur points to the bananas, and says (translated from my other language):

Don't you want to stay here and eat your banana? - Dinosaur said earlier this evening

Hamish even showed me his flat red duck feet and told me that he has "socks", cause he knows I love his sock feet. They are worried cause I am going on a date. I am worried cause I am going on a date and I have no privacy to speak of. Maybe I have to get drunk so that I forget and can relax that I have privacy invasion from aliens. Yeah, well should I go on a date with a guy, or how about staying at home and eating a banana? Hahaha. At least that was funny what he said. Couldn't he think of any other alternatives for fun? What kind of banana is it anyway? Oh god my aliens. Oh well, wish me a great date! I need it.

Fun with Dragon and About Smells and Lovelife

December 02 2014, 2:55 PM - I changed the sheets on my bed. As soon as I begin tearing the old sheets down to the floor, Hamish shows up in the door opening and cheerfully declares "Yes!" and he thinks about wanting to go stomp his feet on that pile of old sheets on the floor and he has the spontaneous thought or inclination to want to pee on those sheets. I also catch him thinking about how the old or used sheets smell like me.

He always thinks it's fun when I change the sheets. Once I caught him actually stomping his feet on the sheets on the floor and actually peeing on them. Luckily both he, and his pee, are in the other "overtune" dimension so we don't get to see or feel him, or his pee.

He likes piles of stuff. He enjoys a pile of autumn leaves in forests, he enjoys a pile of his own shedded sheets and bits of scales, he enjoys standing on small rugs, and he loves standing and stomping with his feet in a pile of my used bed sheets. I always think of a kid with rubber boots on jumping up and down in a pile of autumn leaves when he does that. But I think it's nesting behavior, I think he likes having a mound of soft stuff around him and stomping it just right with his feet. He might not know why he does that.

I don't think I can pick up a smell of me in my bed sheets, but to Hamish there is a very strong smell of me in my used sheets. If I ever ask him what he thinks I smell like, he might say that I smell like the eggs, as he associates the smell of me with the eggs that he has there, or that I have there rather. Some other visiting Reptiles who are perhaps not used to me, sometimes think that I smell immensely pungent of underarm sweat, urine, and female scent, even if my hygiene is up to par, they can pick up the slightest scents. Hamish must be constantly aware of my scent, but that he is used to it.

Reptilians however are known for their hugely pungent body odors, which most human people who meet them have a big problem with. Hamish's personal scent I describe as the smell of old cheese and vomit or actually very similar to the smell of pancreatic juices or bile, a very visceral odor. I'm trying to recall the scent of Snake the Reptilian but can't seem to remember, he rarely visits nowadays. I think the smell of some Reptilians might be so pungent and difficult for our human noses that some humans actually vomit just from the presence of Reptilians, because Reptilians always tell me about how humans vomit when they are taken up to see the Reptiles, so I wonder if their smell might be the cause.

I can handle Hamish's scent though. It's just a part of him, part of the overall experience of Hamish. It is his signature scent. Hamish leaves a very strong visual and olfactory impression when you meet him. So Reptilians have a keenly developed sense of smell, with which they somehow relay information about themselves to each other. Noteworthy, that whenever there is a dinosaur like a velociraptor on the computer screen or television, Hamish immediately starts to sniff toward the screen, fully expecting to encounter its smell. Dragon Turtle eggs have a pleasant sweet aroma to them, the smell of their eggs. Their babies also have a similar Dragon baby smell which the adults no longer have. And, we all know how miserably Hamish suffers from the pungent smell of onions. He would even use onions as weapons against zombies (read in news31.html - Monsters go away!).

One more story: Last night I was wondering what kind of a man I would like to have as a boyfriend. I feel lonely in my lovelife and want to find the right man. But Hamish, who is incessantly reading my mind for any signs of threat to the eggs, because that is his job is to defend the eggs (he takes that job to extremes sometimes), he immediately starts to look around, "Where is he?", he asks me, as if that man I had just imagined about were somewhere in the apartment. Then he wants to bite my hands and my fingers to make me stop thinking about the man.

Poor Dragon. I try to reason with him. Surely if I won't get pregnant then I could have sex with a man? Well? It seems I have a garden inside my womb and from what the aliens sometimes say, it is as if I am sometimes pregnant with many small fertilized embryos lined up in my womb, which they remove while these are still young and place into those open-top boxes of water to further grow. Hamish gets alarmed at any sight or thought of a man's scrotum or penis, he sees it as an immediate threat. So I don't know how it will be if I want to actually live with someone. Sleep next to a man in bed at nights, cuddle, have sex. Hamish has been the man in my life ever since he appeared. I've had a few short flings but Hamish is one of the reasons why I haven't ventured into real relationships with someone, because it would hurt my friendship with my Dragon.

The thought of having a boyfriend and paying attention to a human man who would be the #1 man in my life, feels like a sad thought, because it's been just me and Hamish for so long. It would feel like pushing away my best friend who after all is always living with me and always watching what I do. All the laughs that Hamish gives me, all the conversations that we have, the things that he shares with me about his life and doings, and I with him. I don't want to lose my friendship with him. But, I crave human touch and contact, and I've been single long enough that I need to start looking. I might have to introduce my man to Hamish. I don't know, it's not always easy living with a Dragon Turtle, I have had to figure it out.

Hamish I love you. - me
Don't say Yes, Töööt. - Hamish

I've figured out how to write the sound that Hamish makes, or the word he says, which is Töööt, it has a German character. He's been using that word for the past few months or so, it is his way of saying "Stop!", like "Talk to the hand!", "No more!". It means he's upset and he wants me to stop what I was doing or what I was saying because he doesn't like it... He must be upset because he knows I was writing about finding me a boyfriend.

I love you Turtle Turtle. - me
I said, don't say Yes to him, to me. - Hamish emphasizes
What do you mean? Turtle Socks. What are you talking about? Do you mean, I should not have a boyfriend? - me
Yes-No Men Sex! - Hamish looks with his yellow headlights eyes toward my lower belly where the eggs are and says quite concernedly
But Hamish. I have to have a husband. - me
We would punch your eyes out for you, I said. - Hamish shows me one of the recent batch of hybrids and as if he makes a threat to punch its eyes out, maybe to instill concern in me so that I would change my mind about having a boyfriend

The recentmost batch of hybrids are very ugly. They are white and their body has an odd shape, not at all like human form or Zeta even, but like a creature like the Thubans almost. They have dark eyes and black hair, the black hair presumably comes from a Japanese father. These hybrids don't seem to be "people", they might be a failure batch, and I've seen Hamish eat one of such ones that was a bit larger meaning a bit older and this creature didn't talk, though anyway I asked Hamish not to eat it. Oh an important thought here, that maybe he meant that if I have sex then it might hurt the little embryos that are growing inside me, that is what he might have meant with the eyes being punched or harmed. You can't always assume to know what Dragon Turtle means when he says things, it often takes some deeper investigation, we don't want to misinterpret what he says or misjudge his character in any way.

I didn't say Töööt to you, only to those boys. - Hamish, aha, so he was just disapproving of potential boyfriends
Thank you Hamish. You are a best friend. You are always nice to me. - me
Yes-No, Töööt to you. - Hamish
Thank you Hamish. It makes me feel better. You are a good friend to me. - me
Yes-No to that. - Hamish says and shows me a mental image from up in the sky from when I had a date with a boyfriend maybe a year ago or so, so he had seen that, he said this and then closed his upper and lower eyelids which I think means humility and pacifism

Christmas is coming up...

December 01 2014, 4:52 PM - I was sitting by the kitchen table writing a shopping list for the grocery store. Hamish says "charred liver", he wants some charred liver. Ok, Dragon, so I write "charred liver" on my shopping list. I told him I would check to see if they had any. What I don't do for Dragon.

Hamish told me he wants one of those dog squeaky chicken toys. He wants one to play with, to hunt, to step on, and to hear it squeak. Well, Christmas is coming up, I just might find one. This isn't the first time Sock Turtle is asking for a squeaky chicken chew toy. Also today he asked me for that fine leather bag again. I told him such bags cost a lot of money and he would have to prove to me that he exists first before I spent any big money on him. (I know Hamish is real, but, I could ask for something in return. I am hoping that close contact would eventually lead to me getting to take a photograph, then I could show his duck feet to you all, and back turtle.)

Dragon Droppings

November 29 2014, 1:29 PM - I was deeply attentive in reading my book, when Hamish just wants to let me know that he has made a poo. So I saw a mental image of Hamish who is someplace remote, that big scary red Dragon. He was just thinking about his pile of poo, then he either thought of me which connected me to his thoughts, or that he decided to let me know about it. After all, he is watching the eggs. Our lives are closely intertwined. We probably know every single intimate detail about each other, as a matter of fact we do. No wonder a close friendship ensues from that.