<THOUGHTS

I nearly died in the Illuminati lodge
January 14 2013

Warning: only intended for adult readers. Content is uncomfortable and graphic. I apologise.

Oh my god, oh my god, I just escaped, barely. I just got out of there, just now. It is 11:20 AM and I just made it back here, safely in my bedroom but I really thought I was a goner. I thought I was gonna die for sure. Oh my god I made it back here, thank god that I made it back here. I survived out of the Eye's grasp and the countryclub lounge for the Illuminati headquarters with US President figures and US Generals. I made it back here I survived when they were all eating on me and going to have me die and watch my soul float out of my consumed body. Good god I made it back here, I didn't die, thank god for the holy miracle that I made it back here safely in my room, cause that thing wasn't a dream.

"Please don't bring her back here, she didn't do it with us." - ?

"You forgot the urination part, when everybody urinates on you." - GP?

"So, it's not just muscular, you have got some fat." - the toothless man says!!! oh my god, this now after all of the other

I guess I had a normal night.

NO MORE ALIEN VISITATIONS FROM YOU, GIRL. - ? unknown right now
I am sorry for what ever it is that I did please don't eat me. - I would almost kneel and pray to them
No, it's just us. - General Patton
And our weird dislike of music. - General Patton
And, we won't strangle her. - the toothless man
I was so scared, please, god, don't eat me. Please god don't let them eat me, I was so afraid. - me
We won't bring you back here with General Patton anymore. - ? if not GP
But they were EATING me! They were going to KILL me! Everything was fine up until that point! I was quite happy in the lounge, not afraid at all! BUT THEY WERE GONNA EAT ME UP! GOD DAMNED IT! - me

Let me get back to telling you the story of the worst night of my life, can I really say that? Was it the worst - ooh yes, ooh yes, remembering the Eye god tongue kissing me, oh yes this was the worst night of my life ever, period. Phew, good lord. Good lord indeed oh my god I thought I was a goner, I thought for sure there I was gonna die and never see another day in life ever again. Good lord how good it feels being alive today. Thank god's miracle that I am alive to see this day and to live and to continue my journey! I am alive, and I think that I am safe. Another day, I made it out of there alive.

When I started by saying that "I guess I had a normal night" that was by no means a pun. I meant that the night itself passed seemingly fine. I woke up early in the morning and went back to sleep. This horrible live nightmare happened during when I was asleep in the morning after the night had passed. That is what I meant.

"We love it when they scream." - toothless man
"Oh yes, we got an orgasm from that." - General Patton
I was so afraid... - me

Phew. So the first part of my dreams that I remember is that I am in a large actually beautiful home that is built modern and white, to my liking I suppose. But I am in there to see if my tea is boiling, and I notice that I've cooked some sausages, but there is a big wild cat like a leopard in the other room though I can't see it and it might get in here any moment and kill me. I guess I could jump into that cage up there on that ledge, if I can get to it

You weren't strangled, but I wanted to see that. - Hamish now ("strangled" and "but I wanted to see that" in my language, the other parts in English)
NO, Hamish! - me in other language

At this point I was only dreaming. And all these elements come directly from my life. I boil tea frequently and I recently had some sausages and the big wild cat is from The Sims 1 game where I downloaded some exotic pets and even the cage looks like the door that you can build there. This was just me dreaming, although I rarely have any elements of scary or suspense in my dreams and knowing that the cat might come in was a bit stressful.

But I walked out and I was on an outdoor patio listening to music from my computer. The patio looks like elements taken from The Sims game too, and the music and my computer, well I play the game on my computer and the last thing I did before I went to sleep last night was to play the game. So this was all normal still so far. Nothing wrong, nothing out of the ordinary. (Phew god I can't believe I just made it out of that Illuminati lodge lounge alive! For sure there I was a goner!)

You have got there, some golden hunnun. - Hamish?
WHAT IS HUNNUN! - me, more concerned not angry

Oh god, oh god, that means General Patton is some kind of Illuminati

Ok, it's ok to call us a "gangster". - General Patton

What are these guys? And with the Creepy Eye...

Do you see now why we wanted you to be a doctor? - General Patton
Why? What? To cure myself? FROM THIS MADNESS! Get the hell away from me! I nearly died there!! - me
I have got a nice picture of you. - Stephens??, means photography, said in my native language

Now you know why we wink at you. - General Patton, and as he says "wink" he shows me the Creepy Eye, and I now realize that yes indeed, that creepy alien or creature that keeps winking at me - and by the way it is General Patton who likes to say "wink" when he speaks - is the same as General Patton as I had assumed, they are the same and it is a reference to The Eye

General Patton won't just have you arrested here. - General Patton
I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK THERE! They were trying to eat me and kill me I was going to die there! - me
No, you aren't nothing more than our coffee. - General Patton
So.. I wasn't going to die? - me, feeling comforted
Are you sure about that? - me, calming down

Where was I, oh yes in the dream I was on the outdoor patio at night listening to some really good New Age music, like the positive benevolent New Age music I might add (since things were about to get hairier) not any kind of dark wicca or stuff not that I ever do, but like I said things were about to get hairier.

I am then in a home for children and there is that girl with the long silky black hair and a red dress again. If I am not mistaken she is a child by me and one of the Japanese Dragon Dynasty, I've seen her before. She looks to be about 9 or 10.

Yes! The Komi Saki! - one of the Japanese men
How do they connect to me so quickly? I didn't even want to talk to them. This was a bit confounding, that he talks to me from just that brief mention, but anyway.

I don't want to do this anymore, by the way. I really don't. I thought I was a goner over there in that Illuminati lodge I swear! So I am in this place where they keep children and most of the children are disabled in some ways. I say that I will help care for the children, maybe even I was asked to I cannot remember. There are some legos there with the girl with the long black hair and I play with her. It felt awkward at first cause I haven't played with a child and not with legos for many years, but I felt that these children here are sick and that I can comfort and nurture them.

Aulis Greenshaw wasn't there was he? - General Patton says and does the most horrible "wink" where his face nearly melts I declare it looked like in the series V where the creatures rip their human face masks off and underneath is a reptilian monster, only this time I wasn't sure of what was hidden underneath just that this winking guy's face just malfunctioned and looked all scrambled like a gum mask that just melted and got torn in places how weird!

Then there is an adult human man who is wearing some type of black clothing or uniform and... good god no, no no no no not them!!! GOD NOOOOO!!!!!!!! I NOW REMEMBER THE DECEASED ONES THE SHRINE NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SO SAAAD THAT IT WAS REAL SOMEHOW!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! THE THREE GIRLS WHO HAD DIED NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyhow, the soldier has black hair and he works there.

The soldier asks me if I could help him out. There is a hill and he needs to be on top of that hill, only that there is the plague there on that hill and so obviously he can't go there. So he is asking me if I can go to that hill to clear out the plague, could I do that for him? If I help him then he will help me find a way out of this land, because by now I am in another land like a mystical fantasy world with large landscapes, a river, hills and mountains. And I was also waking up by now and it wasn't like a dream where you go "yeah yeah this is all normal" but one of those dreams where you are really awake and you act and feel as if you were real and awake.

As much as I loved being in this fantasy land which I just wanted to explore and actually stay and live in (it was a positive pleasant fantasy land), I knew I should help him out. I also asked him for a favor, if he could procure for me a camera. I wanted to take pictures of this place for you guys, the readers of my website. I was somewhere else and I wanted you to see it. (Obviously I don't believe that this mystery land existed, but it seemed real at the time, because I was awake.)

Oh god, my Dolly isn't here. - says the toothless man and puts his hands on his face in despair

You know, you were gonna get some really good porn. - General Patton
What? What kind? - me
The lust that we feel here! - Snake in his raptor form
I didn't want to be eaten alive, I didn't want to die there. - me
So, now you know why we need you to be a doctor. - Snake?
Why, oh! Because of the sick children! Is that why! Do I need to help the children? Or is it, with the plague, ... ! What the fuck, what do I care, why the hell should I go back there I WAS NEARLY KILLED AND EATEN! - me cross
You are not superficial are you? - says Snake in his tiny raptor form
No, now what, why? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! - me
You were our Doll here. - Snake the raptor
Yes, it was very pleasant. - General Patton
She even smelled like a perfume! - toothless man, or "had" a perfume

But quick before I forget anything. So it was very much like The Wizard of Oz you find yourself in this fantasy mystery land that is fun to explore.

No no, it wasn't a dream. - General Patton
Don't tell me that! The creepy eye, kissed me! Oh god no, no no no don't let it be... - me, though what am I saying, of course I know that it was all real!

Anyhow, let's continue on with the story. I was gonna go up on that hill to see if I could help him out. Turns out the reason there was a plague there was because of the Black One

The hiatus of this is, ... - General Patton, what the fuck is "hiatus"? let's Google that later

The Black One had resided on that hill and that is why there was the plague. I said to them that that makes much perfect sense, and I tell them how the Black One is surrounded by disease. I ask the men, now there were two more men there besides the soldier with black hair, that aren't they getting sick from the plague? They say that no, they have been vaccinated.

But before I can figure out how to solve their puzzle with the plague on that hill where the Black One has been, they show me to a shelf where there are several cards. It is a shrine for women who have lost their lives. The men tell me that I may open them and see. There is supposed to be letters from loved ones to the deceased in those big pink envelopes. I feel that it is disrespectful to open them because I would feel like it is touching someone's grave, but I reluctantly open one and look at the big photography in it. It is an adult woman maybe 35 and she has long silky brown hair with some red in it I think. In the picture she is in a forest. I gasp as she looks very much like me, only I have always colored my hair and never let exactly my natural tone of hair show, and here this girl has hair more like my natural hair, but her face looks so much like mine, I gasp.

I am then in a hallway and I peek over to the left there is a New Age shop there! A guy I know who owns a restaurant is standing there. Has he changed profession from restauranteur to New Age shop keeper? Also he has gained some more weight, but it is he. He greets someone who then goes inside. He now comes to greet me, and this is where the Creepy Eye god is going to have a hardon and tongue kiss me, I'm not kidding.

So I figure a hug is enough for a greeting and I just do a friendly casual hug, but he starts kissing me on my cheeks, one side then the other side. This could be from The Sims where you can choose whether you hug someone or kiss them on both cheeks as a greeting. Well I see what he is doing he wants to greet me with the two kisses one on each cheek, but he seems to think I didn't do it right so he does it again. But he isn't kissing me on the cheeks he is aiming for my mouth. He then puts his mouth over mine and kisses me on the mouth. I am trying to get loose but he is holding me. I don't think this is appropriate at all.

No, it wasn't convenient was it. - ?

(No, she won't go to a hospital over this!) - General Patton? to someone else there?

He then puts his tongue into my mouth and I don't like that at all! He then gets a hardon though he still has his pants and clothes on. He starts rubbing his hardon on me while his tongue is in my mouth. The only reason I am saying this is because it wasn't a human or a dream at all. While he holds me like that and is doing those things I then see the Creepy Eye in his place. That dang Creepy Eye.

So don't you now see why we need you to be a doctor? - ?
No, it doesn't make sense. - me
The conjunction of this is, that we need you here. - ?
What do you need me for! As a doctor? Are the children sick? I don't get it. Is somebody ill? - me

How to describe what the Eye looks like... The Eye actually also exists in the pit of the stomach of the Black One. There in his belly, the Eye is a portal that twists the light, the life, the juice, the human life force that the Black One ingests, from being resonant with light and into being darkness and stomped out. The Eye is surrounded by several lines like wrinkles, and is itself when you look at it like a hole. The Eye is very much like a black hole in space, it ingests, it obliterates. And it has a distinctly cold, satanic, hellish feel to it like dead lifeless ashes from a burned corpse or a burned house

What kind of house? Let it be like a hotel. - Hamish?

it feels like the dead lifeless ashes after something burned to ashes, cold like steel, completely heartless, and it feels like pestilence and disease, like rotting and decay. It has a very distinct feel to it, the Eye does and also the Black One who carries the eye in the pit of his stomach.

I don't quite know what the Eye is, only that it is their god and that "it tells them what to do", say the black Reptilians, and then Hamish and Snake and other not-black reptilians do what the black reptilians tell them to do, and so it is this power hierarchy in the form of the pyramid where everybody does what the upper ones says and right up top on that hierarchy, sits that dang Creepy Eye, who just put his tongue in my mouth and rubbed his hardon on me in the form of a person that I knew from my life.

Before you say anything else, tell us why we can't have you back here? - ?
... Because I thought I was going to die that's why. - me
Well, you aren't an alien incarnated then? - General Patton?
(Yes, she has a good figure!) - General Patton says to the others while thinking of my figure, and his thought image of my figure looks like what mine does, meh, I'm not that "good" of a figure, I'm a bit curvy just on the verge of "plump"

Where was I. So the Creepy Eye does that. And then things get a bit extra tricky, bear with me here.

"The General is sitting over there", somebody in the reception says to me and points toward the lounge. The General wants to see me so I will go see him. I walk into the lounge. It is a narrow room that stretches downward and you walk down some steps throughout the room. Rather than a large, square lounge like that you were imagining, the lounge stretches almost like a corridor though not narrow enough to be a corridor, and there are large steps so that the lounge actually isn't level.

It looks to be a gentleman's club for sure, not just because there are no women there. It looks like some kind of mid 1800's lounge or lodge. It is made in a dark mahogany wood that has been polished and varnished in so many layers. It must be expensive, and I declare I have never seen such wood before. It looks like the kind of wood that is both extremely expensive, as well as outdated by now. Kind of like the wood equivalent of fine marble. I really don't feel that I belong here, it must be a millionaires club.

I feel like I shouldn't be there and I'm trying to be as quiet as I can and not disturb anything. There are lounge chairs to the left and to the right, some are facing upwards (remember the steps) and some are facing downwards, so it's kind of like where you can just sit down and read something, or smoke a cigar, and the chairs are placed so that you do get some privacy. The chairs aren't arranged in a fashion that would encourage conversation between people, they are more arranged privately even though many chairs are close to one another, they are mostly facing away from one another so that everybody gets their own private time to just sit and contemplate, but conversations between two or three people are also possible, or that if anybody wishes to talk in the lounge everybody in the lounge would hear actually. But it seems to mostly encourage silent contemplation in some kind of restful setting in a luxurious but outdated environment from the 1800's.

Luxury, huh? - says Snake or someone else

Well I have to go see the General. I was asked to go see the General, that the General wants to see me. I am fully awake by the way. My mind is clear and I am not in the state of mind where I would be dreaming or taking things for granted. All of my five senses are awake and clear, I am taking it all in as if I were real there. I am in a lounge.

Oh, why weren't you stripping? - toothless man
Umm, was I supposed to? - me
We can't have you here (again), if you don't do something for us. - toothless man
But I thought I was gonna die! I thought they were going to kill me! - me
(Oh, why won't she join with us?) - toothless man

There are many men sitting in these lounge chairs, just comfortably sitting and quiet. It is a restful atmosphere, nobody seems to be in any rush to go anywhere, nobody seems alert but everybody seems relaxed as if there was no time to keep track of at all. I look in the corner and see a teacher that I once had. I nearly have to rub my eyes is it really him sitting there? But yes it is. This is a teacher who was mean, that is a whole other story but I have gotten information from the Agenda over the years that has hinted at that he was part of the Illuminati thang to ruin my life and which ultimately led me to the path where I was able to run into the arms of the Free Mason Master for the Illuminati gang.

To my astoundment there is a black man sitting there though all of the other men are white. President Barack Obama is sitting there. Goodness gracious, I decide to just quietly and carefully tiptoe past him and try to make myself not bother anyone, after all I am not as old as most of these men are, I am not dressed up like they are all in suits and I'm not rich or important like all these are and I am not a man either and I really don't belong in this lounge, but the General is sitting over there and he wanted to see me.

I had assumed that it is General Patton but I wasn't sure but I thought it would be him. I wanted to find out what he wanted to see me for. I lean over to the left because there is a column in the way I can't see where he would be further down the lounge. Either further down the lounge or to the left of me or up the lounge was sitting President Bush the younger one if I recall (I may recall this wrong, because:) and then sitting up the lounge as I turn around to look up is sitting what looks to be a mixture of President Obama and President Bush, as if a hybrid between the two, half black half white. I am just astounded at seeing that. (So, not sure anymore if I saw the actual President Bush or just the part of him in that hybrid.)

I never make it down to see the General. There is a toothless man sitting there up the lounge as I turned around. I can't remember, oh yes I can! He is a smallish man, short and little. His hair is gray and he is not balding, he wears no glasses. He isn't perfectly toothless but he is missing one of his upper front teeth and has big gaps in his teeth. This is the toothless man who has been talking here throughout. He must've said something about killing someone, because I recall saying quite proudly that "I can't. Because I am too conscious, I can't choose to give away the light and be with the dark", or something like that. I had been asked or invited to take part in some killing or consumption of someone or something like that, and I had said that I simply cannot. I don't do dark stuff like that.

The toothless man and then everybody in the whole damn lounge comes at me it looks just like when a pack of hungry zombies surround a corpse to eat. They are touching me all over and tickling me, they pinch me all over not like painful pinches with fingertips and fingernails but larger pinches like with several fingers softer pinches. I am convinced that they are eating me, and I am aware that they are eating of my intestines and everything. For sure I thought they were literally gonna pull my body apart and consume every last bit. It didn't occur to me to think that they were only eating the energy that is in all of my body parts even the intestines.

They surrounded me in several layers just like a hoard of zombies does in the movies, like everybody couldn't fit around me so there were layers and rows of them but everybody was near me.

We were seeing it like the sun! - toothless man says

I thought that I was dying and being eaten. I screamed for help and I screamed like I have never heard myself scream before and never heard anyone else scream before, it was the scream of death and dying. I am so sad to have had to go through that. I screamed "Help me!!!" I really thought I was dying.

Then the toothless man yells out to the congregation something like, "Quiet! It is happening!" And everybody steps back and watches as my soul floats out of my body and my soul fills up the room in a bright white light. Did they just kill me? I thought so. I see my soul leaving my body and I am floating in the room. I then see outer space with all the stars and I realize that my soul has detached from my body and I am back to outer space like where I started from before I incarnated and my life begun in this body this life. The congregation go all silent and still and they revel in being in the presence of my soul. It is something they want to feel and they are quiet and perfectly still. There is something disturbingly perverse about their enjoyment of taking part in watching a soul leave a body and the body die, it is as if they themselves live lifeless soulless lives in the deep dark pits of hell and with the creepy eye

That is why we want you to be a doctor. - ?
We won't tell you that we are benign. - ?
We won't tell you about the Mein Kampf anymore. - ?
Blood and gore!! - Snake the raptor with glare over his eyes, his eyes glare up when he is ecstatic

and with the creepy eye, and that this is their only glimpse of what life could have been, they have no lives or souls of their own, they think that they can live without it, yet they crave it, their bodies start to die without it, and they seek it out in others who are alive.

Thank god I made it back here safely and woke up here. In fact I could see my bedroom very clearly before I was back in my body and before my body opened its eyes back here in bed. This was an out of body experience. I had one when I had a surgery too (surgery in real life not with aliens or Illuminati). So this was serious. Could I have died? I certainly left the body. I feel that somebody benevolent helped me back to my body, an Angel was with me for sure, or I would have been a goner, my soul lost and returned to outer space.

Such is the story of when I was taken to the Illuminati

The Gator boys want you too. - ?

The Illuminati lounge. Hamish has been cranky and hostile the past two days, insisting that I call him "The Honored", instead of "My Dragon". This has all gone haywire. I won't do this again. And every time that I try to have an intimate, private moment with myself, the Black One Malik shows up to steer my thoughts into watching his mind transferred films where I am married to a CIA MKULTRA handler who abuses me and who treats me as a sex toy who is the "MK-Cat", as General Patton calls it. They would do domestic violence, he would share me with his coworkers, they would drug me, I would not be allowed to speak, they would put a collar on me. It is just one big can of worms and it's stretched my tolerance now. I don't know if I was going to have died in that lounge, but this is one can of worms I am not going to be polite around anymore. I have had it.

We thought that, you were very sexual. - ? Hamish or toothless man
(YES! SHE WAS VERY SEXUAL!) - one yelling to another, amongst themselves

You are one of our, sex toys. - toothless man
And who are you? - me, blase
We wanted you to be our, female nurse. - Snake raptor

You forgot to say to them, Helter Skelter. - Malik the Black One in intermediate demon form

I forgot to say, that when I got back here I begged and pleaded to The Eye god of theirs to please not kill me and to please not let them have me die! The Eye said that "if I join" then they won't harm me. Of course I will not join, it's like wearing your perfect white wedding dress on your wedding day and being asked to jump down into a deep dark well that is filled with putrid mud and shit. That is the difference between light and dark, between good and evil. Like the best sparkly white dress on the best day of your life, and the worst most darkest and ugliest filthiest place there is. Only those that live in the darkness, such as the Illuminati, do not know the difference. Also they do not want to climb out of their hell, they think it's good enough to look at and feel the wedding dresses so to speak of all those whom they pull down into that deep dark well with them, until it is made filthy like them and they want more. They see only a glimpse of that light, and then it is gone, for they cannot keep it trapped in their fingers, the soul can only be kept in the heart, and they have no heart.

Looks like you won't be our pet. - toothless man or Snake raptor or both

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